Writing

While reading FOTR I came across this paragraph which I shall now take out of context: "At that moment there was a knock on the door, and Sam came in. He ran to Frodo and took his left hand, awkwardly and shyly. He stroked it gently and then he blushed and turned hastily away." Well. The slash just writes itself, doesn't it?

 Slash: Fanfiction depicting two fictional characters as being gay when they actually aren't. I believe Harry Potter fans are the ones who really brought slash writing into light. An example of this is readily available at fanfiction.net. If I search for Snape fanfiction I get 24,297 results. Now, if I remove certain words, such as "Slash, Harry, James, Sirius, Dumbledore, and Voldemort" we are left with 14,101 results. I'd have removed the word Lupin as well but they didn't leave enough text space in the "search without these words" box. And I know from experience this still doesn't mean all the slash is gone. There are other parings that are less popular, such as Lucius/Snape, Krakornof (sp?)/Snape, and the such. And then there's fics that don't advertise what they are. I am going to, sometime when I have time, make a motivational poster with images of every character I can think of and title it "Harry Potter Fans: We'll ship anything". Cause we will. Trust me, we will. The only ship I ever really got into was Snape/Lily, and this was before DH, when I thought I was just another weird shipper. Oh, the delight I had when my ship turned canon. I also dabbled in Draco/Hermoine, even though I knew it wouldn't happen. I do admit it was seeing SS in movie format that really bumped Snape up into the running for favorite character. But I justify this by telling myself that if OOTP had come out before the SS movie I would have liked Snape anyway due to the "Snape's Worst Memory" chapter. Now there is no contest. Snape is far, beyond, and without a doubt my favorite character. Harry? Pfft, Harry's a twat. He's not even in my top three. Not sure who those spots belong to. Probably Ginny has one of them. Lupin would have if he'd been played by Ewan McGregor like everyone wanted. Bleh. Snape is my favorite character because he takes angst and manliness to create a delicious combination I'm sure many a woman would not be able to resist. From being a child watching his parents fight to being an outcast at school to developing Best Friend Syndrome to losing Lily to having to endure not only everyone hating him and being suspicious of him but watching Harry grow up. One fanfiction I can't remember the name of said it best, it's about Snape's viewpoint of the Snape's Worst Memory chapter of OOTP, and this is only a loose quote as I don't remember it word for word: "He pushed Harry against the wall, *bam* it was James he saw sagging against in pain, and he relished in the anger coursing through him, in his causing pain to the man who had made his life a living hell... Harry looked up *bam* it was Lily he saw now, Lily's eyes staring at him. Lily whom he'd just hurt. Hatred for himself swelled within him as he let Harry run from the room. His hands clenched into fists and his eyes closed as pain swelled within him, making his breathing come hard and sharp." Ok, so I added my own flare to that. *sigh* Oh, but wasn't that lovely. I love angst. If you take all my favorite characters from various sources you'll see they all have angst.
Boba Fett: Lost his father at a young age, has no mother, lives alone and prefers it, is dangerous and deadly, the best at what he does. He is silent and strong, and deep down just needs someone who loves him. (Note: I abhor Karen Traviss and tend to 'forget' her books exist.)
Severus Snape: Was raised by parents who often fought, his father was a drunk, he was very poor, he met Lily as a child and they became best friends, later he fell in love with her but her interest in the Dark Arts as well as his being her best friend turned her away and she soon fell in with the cool athletic kid who had spent their childhood tormenting Snape, and then she died and Snape spent the rest of his life being treated with hatred and disrespect and being outcast from most society only finding refuge at Hogwarts. Most people never realized just how much of a hero he really was, living the most dangerous life of all, and all for the woman he loved.
hm, well, actually, the only other angst-ridden guys on the list are people I know so little about that I'm not sure I would be justified in calling myself a fan of any of them. Aragorn, of course, I only know from the movies.  Sasuke Uchiha, from Naruto, I only know from the cartoons up till that main test thing where he gets bitten (or whatever), and of course Victor makes fun of him constantly. Obi-Wan has some angst, but not enough for him to really make the list, unless you want to get into the whole Obi/Siri Tachi, or Obi/Cerasi thing. (personally I prefer Siri Tachi over Cerasi) ...not fictional, but Victor has had an angst-ridden life and angst continues to follow him. Despite what he says, he keeps saying that there is no angst, but he doesn't see his eyes in the dead of night or hear his voice when talking of such things. Sometimes, a lot of times, angst is to be read between the lines. You have to imagine the character and how they feel. You have to imagine how you would feel if every cell in your body cried out for someone, your arms itched and your fingers twitched to hold them, and to know they are outside your grasp for any of various reasons, you believe yourself not good enough and you don't want to drag an angel into the hell of your life, their family would not permit it, they are dead, it would mean the destruction of both your lives (either for losing your positions, titles, jobs, etc, or for compromise that would eat away at you, or literally), etc. And then take whatever else has happened to this character and picture that too, and how they must feel. And then wallow in it. Get worked up about it, fume about it, think on it, feel it, taste it, be it. This is why outside distraction is so bad when writing or reading or watching. You're there, you're in the story... and then suddenly someone's talking to you. And by time you get back into it the moment's over. Like in Jewel of the Nile, the beginning, where she's writing and she's there and a part of the story and she's in it, and then whatshisname says something to her and BAM she's lost it. I totally understand that. Sometimes when I write it's as if the story is there and my fingers are the vessel which carries the words to the screen before me. I have one story now, it came to me in a dream last Thursday and followed me throughout the day. A lot of my stories have the characters titled Him, Her, Her Mom, His Friend, The King, etc, but for this I sat down and made names for most everyone. Maybe it's just because this is a new story and I've gotten tired of the old ones but I really want to write this one out. I can almost feel the story, I see the setting in my mind perfectly, and it cries out to me. This one is unlike any of my others. This one has a sort of cold grit of reality to it that my others don't. This one has a time-period even! Most of my others are just plain fantasy, might happen on this world, might happen on that world, happens in no specific time. But this one, even though it is set on it's own planet (as in I have no setting other than weather and terrain that could be anywhere in the North/West) it has a time period that I will attempt to stick to somewhat faithfully. I write in my mind as a means to fall asleep. I have one story that's just about mostly written... in my mind. I only have so many scenes actually written. I have another I never started putting to reality that's entirely in my mind. And I  have another that is an offshoot of the previous one I mentioned that I did start writing though I haven't made names for anyone. And then I have yet another which I have determined to abandon. And another that is pretty bad and so will probably never be written. Unless I want to do what Ewan McGregor did in A Life Less Ordinary about the book he wrote, "Of course it's rubbish that's the point. You pick it up at the airport, read it on holiday." But back to what I was saying, I just need to sit down and write more. The mood just doesn't strike me as often as it used to. Which is sad since because I'm older and know so much more I could write so much better. And with Victor here I know any fight scenes or problems involving how men think I could just turn around and ask. But therein lies another problem, I get irrationally shy whenever he's in the room while I'm writing. I fear he'll turn around and peek over my shoulder and read what I write and tell me it's bad or correct something and I'll hate what I did. Sometimes the words just strike me and I go with it, even if it's stupid or has nothing to do with anything or has no place in the story or is just totally unrealistic. These parts I usually delete, sometimes I find a grain of gold and edit until it's reasonable. But this new story is so tangible... I must write it to completion.Oh, and there's always a happy ending.

I suppose I shall never get any writing done if I spend my day writing here of how I love to write. lol

Today I am wearing my lovely blue sweater. It's a replacement for one I wore till it had holes in it and was so grimy no amount of washing would clean it. I've had the original since I was about 11 or 12. I was amazed to find almost the same exact sweater at Wal-Mart last year. Different brand, somewhat different styling in places, but overall the same sweater.

Later we're going to go check out the Asian Buffet that opened a week or so ago. First we'll check the prices and if it's reasonable we'll have dinner there. We also have to get cat food and litter.

Last night I took in the shoulder of my tunic but I'll take a picture of that later and upload it.